The Dolphin Machine

I was thumbing through Intersection magazine today and I ran across a short piece on something called a SeaBreacher that stopped me in my tracks. A California-based company called Innerspace has invented what amounts to a dolphin machine. Looks like a dolphin. Moves like a dolphin. Jumps like a dolphin ... but you get to freaking ride in it! With a friend! It's a dolphin machine! (Anybody read Christopher Moore's Fluke? If so, this thing should seem somewhat familiar.)

This thing goes 40 mph on the surface and 20 mph under water. It can jump 10 feet in the air. It can do barrel rolls. It costs $70,000, and the people who invented it expect dolphin-machine races in the future to rival monster trucks in popularity.

All I can say is, I hope this thing starts a trend, because I love the idea of animal machines. The possibilities are endless, but what I'd really like is an elephant machine.

Imagine what you could do with this thing! I don't think the monster-truck drivers are going to sweat much about racing dolphins -- are the spectators going to wear scuba gear? -- but get a few elephants crushing cars at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas and Bigfoot just might have some competition.

More on the Jesus Tomb Thing

I don't want to talk too much religion (or politics) on this board, but I saw the Discovery Channel special on the Jesus family tomb a couple of nights ago, and a strange idea occurred to me. (If you've been under a rock and you don't know the gist of this claim, Google Jesus Tomb before reading the rest of this post, or look at Spooge's previous post on the subject.)

One of the basic beliefs of the Christian religion is that Jesus is going to return to earth. As I was watching a scientist perform tests on what the filmmakers claim is Jesus' DNA, I got to thinking: What if somebody were to clone that DNA?

Hmmm....